So here's an update of what's been going on lately....
On February 8th I went to the funeral of one of my cousins. I did not know him too well and we weren't even blood related (He's my halfbrother's biological cousin, not mine) but he was still family.
The funeral itself was a somber affaire, like they usually are but there was one thing I found especially beautiful. When we arrived to the chapel the sky was grey and the ground covered in snow. Then, when we were supposed to go out and bring the coffin to the grave, it started snowing. Big, white snowflakes were falling from the sky and everything was so quiet. It kept going as we all walked in a hoard of black dressed people through the woods to the gravesite. And it never stopped. In fact, it kept snowing all through that day and the next one.
There was something very touching about that.
This is what I wore to the funeral, along with my thick black coat. It was freezing cold but I couldn't bring myself to care.
While we were standing there at the grave, and I had said my farewells to Victor, I decided to take the time to say farewell to something else as well. Something I have carried with me for a very long time. I figured it would be better if I act as if it had died. Then I can bury it, mourn it and then move on. It will make things a little easier, at least. I want to be done with it.
I want to be done with you.
No doubt there will be times when I still will think about you, but at least there will be no more What If's. That's a small comfort, if anything.
~~~
The next day it was my Birthday. February 9th. I turned 22 years old.
Originally I had intended to spend the day playing games and drinking tea like usual, but then a few weeks ago I was talking to a group of friends about meeting up sometime and I thought... We might as well meet up on the 9th, if they were all free that day. Which they were. So we decided to have a teaparty at my place. It was meant to be a celebration of both mine and Tea's birthday, but she ended up not feeling well that day so she couldn't come. :(
Everyone else came though. My, Varga, Hillevi, Sandra and Josefine. We ate a lot of cake, cookies, cupcakes and thaifood, drank a lot of tea and just had a wonderful time. It was much nicer than sitting alone, I must admit ;)
This is the outfit I wore :3 I really love the blue Alice and the Pirates Onepiece I got for Christmas. It's wonderful to wear both on it's own and with another dress over it.
I'll upload pics of my presents some other time~